The most important job in the world is…
Being a parent! Parenting is in equal parts wonderful and challenging. With the right information and support, all parents can develop their parenting skills to provide happy, safe environments for their children. They can also have fun with their children and really enjoy their time together.
You don’t have to do it alone – because we love parenting!
Being a Parent is the Most Important Job in the world
We love to hear from you
Recent Posts
Providing evidence-based information and advice
Homepage
Help Your Child To Problem Solve – It’s a Life Skill!December 7, 2023Home Life / Homepage DisplaySolving problems is such an important life skill and one that we are constantly striving to perfect throughout life. As parents, we can sometimes take this responsibility out of our children’s hands. Sometimes it seems easier to solve their problems for them. We can feel like it’s our job, our responsibility. It helps them and makes their lives easier and often our own lives are simpler if we just do it ourselves. But this is not always the best option for our children and it is important that they learn and practice problem solving skills from a young age so that they can become confident in their ability to solve problems throughout their lives.
So how can parents help their children learn this vital life skill? Try to turn problem solving into a game and make it fun. Your children could become “detectives” trying to solve their problems. When your child has a problem help them to generate lots of ideas about what they could do so that they have a number of choices. Make it personal for them if you can. Ask them if they have ever had a problem like this before and what they did then or maybe their friend had a similar experience, what did they do?
Allow them the time to explore each solution. For example they could act it out for you or draw pictures. It doesn’t have to be complicated – just ask them to show you. This process helps children to have an awareness of the possible consequences of each solution. When exploring possible solutions help your child to figure out which might be the best one by asking them is it fair? Is it safe? Does it lead to good feelings?
Investigate the feelings that each solution generates with them. Naming feelings is important for children so that they can learn to self regulate and learn better responses. Prepare your children for the possibility that their solution might not work. Ask them what they will do next if it doesn’t.
The best way to teach our children these skills is to model them. Talk through the process of solving some of your own problems aloud. Include the steps of generating ideas, exploring which one would be best, considering feelings and planning for the possibility that your first solution might not work. Use stories, puppets, drawing and role play so that children can learn this skill and practice it over and over, enabling them to refine and perfect their problem solving abilities.
This article was contributed by a member of Parenting Limerick. Parenting Limerick is a network of parenting and family support organisations. [...]
Supporting Your Child’s Self-Esteem Throughout Their LifetimeNovember 30, 2023Health & Welbeing / Homepage DisplaySelf-esteem describes the way we think and feel about ourselves and our abilities. It is the opinion we have about ourselves – it is not related to other people’s view of us. A healthy level of self-esteem is beneficial in childhood and throughout life. It allows us to look at life positively, believe in ourselves, and feel proud of what we can do. If you have low self-esteem, you might not feel as confident, and you may think less positively about yourself.
Babies are not born with self-esteem. It is something that develops throughout life, and is shaped by individual experience. Several things can influence self-esteem; such as, genetics, relationships, friendships, personality traits, life changes, successes and failures, peer pressure, and school work. Self-esteem begins when an infant feels safe, accepted, and loved. It is crucial for infants to build a positive self-image and subsequent self-esteem. It helps growth by promoting good relationships and boosting ambitions. Infants learn about self-esteem by observing how others react to them.
As children grow older and go to school, they enter a time that impacts greatly how they feel about themselves. Things that can make children have lower self-esteem include not doing well in school, being treated badly by peers, and getting too much negative feedback. When children have low self-esteem; they might feel like they are not as good as others, be hard on themselves, lack confidence, talk negatively about themselves, and be more influenced by what their friends do. On the other hand, children with high self-esteem are usually more confident in social situations, know their strengths and weaknesses, and can bounce back from challenges. As children develop, so too does their self-esteem when they are involved in activities they enjoy, are making friends, learning in school, and reaching their goals.
In early adolescence, self-esteem can be challenged due to numerous changes and transitions. A drop in self-esteem during adolescence can be common and can be linked to feelings of worry, sadness, and not doing well in school. Hormonal changes of puberty can also have an impact. Supporting young people with their self-esteem during this period is important is important for their confidence, mental health and ongoing learning.
The relationship between parents and children is crucial for building good self-esteem. As parents or caregivers, we aim to be a safe and welcoming place for our children. We want them to feel accepted, share their thoughts openly, and find comfort through talking openly with us. When parents show love, accept their children, and listen to them, it makes children feel safe and valued. This helps children believe in themselves and feel more confident, and develop a good opinion of themselves. ‘Being with’ your child when they’re going through strong emotions helps them understand and express their feelings. Children learn about themselves and the world by watching and experiencing things, particularly how their caregivers act. When children see adults talking positively to themselves and about themselves, it helps them learn to do the same, have positive thoughts about themselves, and in turn develop their own levels of healthy self-esteem.
Primary Care Child and Family Psychology Service are delivering an online parenting workshop on “Supporting your child’s self-esteem throughout their lifetime” on Thursday 7th December, 10.00-11.30am. This workshop is for parents, caregivers or guardians of children aged 0 – 10. To attend contact Dimitrios 087-223-1457.
This article was written Emily Higgins, Psychology Assistant with HSE Primary Care Child and Family Psychology Service. The Child and Family Psychology Service are members of Parenting Limerick, a network of parenting and family support services. For more information about this and other topics go to www.loveparenting.ie
Top-tips to Develop Self-Esteem in Children & Adolescents
Babies & Toddlers (0-2 years):
Play and Explore
Play with your baby and allow them explore safe areas – encourage their curiosity and build confidence.
Let your baby explore and try things on their own (e.g. choosing their toy). It shows them they can do things by themselves and builds independence.
Model Positive Behaviour
Babies learn from caregivers. Smile, talk, and make eye contact with your baby to help them feel positive.
Use words that make your baby feel good. Instead of saying “no,” try gently redirecting behaviour.
Childhood (3-12 years):
‘Being With’: Co-Regulation
‘Being with’ is staying with your child in their feelings; not downplaying them.
Naming emotions; for example, ‘I see you’re feeling upset…’
Soothe your child and help them calm down.
Model Healthy Behaviour
Children learn from how you treat yourself. Show your child that you talk positively to yourself and have a healthy attitude about yourself.
Show your child you have compassion towards yourself and you can learn from mistakes.
Social Media
Demonstrate healthy, structured social media use to your child.
Set internet guidelines and boundaries; for example, ‘no screentime after 8pm’.
Open communication about internet use with active monitoring.
Adolescence (13-18 years):
Teach Resilience and Independence
Help them learn from failures and develop resilience.
Allow them to make age-appropriate decisions and take on responsibilities.
Model Healthy Behaviour
Encourage healthy habits, both physically and mentally.
Teach them to set and respect personal boundaries.
Encourage them to express themselves openly, and feel proud of who they are. Celebrate their individuality. [...]
Celebrating Children’s Rights: Universal Children’s DayNovember 20, 2023Health & Welbeing / Homepage DisplayUniversal Children’s Day is officially celebrated on Monday, November 20th, but people around the world have been holding events all this week. Universal Children’s Day marks the date in 1959 when the UN General Assembly adopted the Declaration of the Rights of the Child. It is also the date in 1989 when the UN General Assembly adopted the Convention on the Rights of the Child. Ireland ratified the Convention on the Rights of the Child in 1992.
Why is this so important? It recognises, on a global scale, that children have special rights and that all children deserve to have their rights protected. Everyone has a role in protecting the rights of children: governments, schools, communities, families and parents. Parents, as the first carers and protectors of children, have a special role to play. Below is a summary of some of the rights included in the Convention and ideas as to how parents can help protect those rights.
Children have the right to care and to be part of a family. All children need love and affection—for babies, parents and carers show this my holding them close and responding quickly to their needs. As children grow older, they still need as much love and affection, although this may look different. Babies need to be held and cuddled often; teenagers need to know that you are still there to provide safety and a warm hug even if they seem to be pulling away
Children have the right to food, clothing, a safe place to live and to have their basic needs met. If, as a parent, you struggle to provide any of these things for your child, the government has a responsibility to support you and your child to meet their basic needs.
Children have the right to an education. Education is essential so that all children can reach their full potential. In the early years, this means talking, reading and playing with your child. As they grow, this continues, but parents also have an important role in ensuring that their child attends school and advocating for their child if any issues arise
Children have the right to play. This is how children learn, and all children should have access to open, safe spaces where they play, explore and spend time with their friends
Children have the right to use their voice and to have it heard. Children, of all ages, have the right to express their views on what happens to them, and, as far as is possible, to have their views respected. Parents play a pivotal role in listening to their children and supporting them to express their views.
This is just a taste of some of children’s rights. If you would like more information on the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child, please see www.itsyourright.ie for a child-friendly explanation. Discussing this with your child can be a great way to explore your child’s understanding of their rights and the rights of all children. It can open up a discussion of how family and government should support the rights of children in Ireland and around the world. If you are struggling as a parent in supporting the rights of your child, please go to www.loveparenting.ie for a range of services in Limerick that can help you.
This article was contributed a member of Parenting Limerick. [...]
Great rhymers, make great readersNovember 16, 2023Homepage Display / Learning to TalkThe importance of nursery rhymes for children:
Great rhymers, make great readers; Songs and rhymes are a cornerstone of language development, positive interaction and early learning in childhood. Some of your earliest memories may be of a family member or friend singing with you to ‘Round and Round the Garden’ or ‘Two Little Dickie Birds’. This is because from before we are born, our ears tune in to the rhythms and sounds of language. The sound of your mother’s heartbeat was the first rhythm you knew.
As young children hear and practice rhymes and songs, they tune in to the rhythm of language in sounds, words and phrases. They also hear and practice inflection, pitch and facial expression. Most importantly, this fundamental learning happens in a fun and positive way between children and adults.
In early infancy, nursery rhymes and songs pave the way for language, learning and communication. When we sing songs and rhymes with young children we are letting them hear repetitive lines and listen to the sounds of language. Babies are learning to look at faces and interpret meaning in facial expression. They are also learning to listen and begin to anticipate sounds and actions. Babies will often move their arms and legs in enjoyment, look intently at us or make sounds while we sing rhymes and songs. These are their signals to us, letting us know they are happy and keen to get involved. By
Going slowly
Using actions
Getting face to face at a baby’s level
you can help your child to get involved in songs and rhymes.
As children grow, nursery rhymes continue to be a key source of interaction and learning between children and adults. Nursery rhymes have been proven to be hugely important from a variety of language development perspectives as they:
Expose children to vocabulary they might not usually hear e.g. ‘fetching a pail of water’
Often tell a story with a beginning, middle and end. This teaches children that events happen in sequence, and they begin to learn how to understand and follow stories.
They have familiar patterns and they help children to learn easy recall and memorisation.
Toddlers and young children continue to benefit from and enjoy nursery rhymes as they get bigger.
Nursery rhymes use patterns and repetitive structures, so children begin to learn simple maths skills as they recite them. Many rhymes also use numbers, counting, and other maths words that children need to learn, such as size and weight.
Research has shown that awareness of rhyme and the ability to sing songs and rhymes positively supports children’s language development and early literacy and reading skills. The saying ‘great rhymers, make great readers’ holds true considering the range of essential communication and language skills children learn through rhymes and song.
Article provided by: Speech and Language Therapist, Little Voices – ABC Start Right & HSE Mid-West Speech and Language Therapy Department. [...]
Self-regulation in TeensNovember 9, 2023Homepage Display / TeenagersParent self-regulation
Responding calmly helps us to model self-regulation, while also preventing escalation of emotions and behaviours.
Take note of your own thoughts, feelings and reactions during stressful interactions with your adolescent.
Use strategies to calm yourself, and to respond effectively and compassionately to others.
Co-regulation
Show your teen that you care by recognising and responding to their signals and needs.
Provide care and love in times of distress, and show interest in their world.
Model self-regulation, provide instruction, prompt reflective conversation and provide reinforcement.
Don’t try to reason with your teen while they are experiencing a big emotion. Connect and regulate first, reason later!
Structure the Environment
Try to provide a buffer against environmental stressors and ensure a physically and emotionally safe environment for teenagers. Know and manage their technology and social media use.
Get to Know your Teen’s Triggers
It is important become aware of your teen’s mood fluctuations. Consider their mood changes, and try to notice if something may have triggered their emotional response.
Validating Emotions
Validating feelings means acknowledging feelings, and allowing your teenager to feel their emotions without trying to ‘fix it’ by offering advice or solutions. It also means not dismissing the feelings of our children.
Sometimes it can feel harder to validate certain feelings, such as anger. In these cases, it is important to remember that we can validate the feeling, but not necessarily the action or behaviour.
The Basics: Eat, sleep, exercise
These seem like simple things but this does not take away from their importance and influence on your teen’s mood and self-regulation abilities. Therefore, it is important to consider whether your teenager is eating a nutritious diet, getting enough exercise and time outdoors, and sleeping well. [...]
You, Your Teen and Big EmotionsNovember 9, 2023Homepage Display / TeenagersAdolescence is a time of great change where young people move from the simple, managed world of childhood into the more complex, unpredictable world of adulthood. Sullen and grumpy mood swings, along with the other normal, but sometimes frustrating, indications of being a teenager are signs that your child is experiencing complex emotions and working hard to understand and manage them. This is an important part of teenage development and you, as their parent, have a big part to play in helping them as they navigate through adolescence into adulthood.
Although the brain has reached its full size by early adolescence, significant development, change and fine-tuning continues into early adulthood. The front, decision-making part of the brain, responsible for planning, thinking about consequences of actions, solving problems and controlling impulses, is one of the last parts to develop, continuing until about 25 years of age. Because of this, teenagers often rely on another part of the brain called the amygdala to make decisions and solve problems. The amygdala is the emotional part of the brain and this helps us to understand why teenagers may act on impulse, take risks, and display aggressive or dysregulated behaviour.
Many of the common teenage behaviours that parents find hard to deal with are an essential part of puberty and growing up. Surges of hormones, body changes, pressures from peers and a developing sense of independence, can lead to the teenage years being a particularly confusing time for your child. Teenagers are often observed to become detached, wanting more time alone or with friends, rejecting attempts to talk or show affection, and experiencing frequent mood swings. It can be helpful to remember that your child or young person may not have as much control over the way they react, feel or behave as you may think. However, they can be supported to understand, manage and regulate themselves.
Parents act as ‘role models’ for their children, whereby children pick up what they need to know by watching and copying their parents. Therefore, teenagers are likely to have picked up ways of managing their emotions from their parents. It can be helpful to reflect and notice how you tend to respond to problems yourself – do you think issues through one step at a time or do you tend to get overwhelmed and act impulsively? Do you anger and become frustrated easily? How do you manage yourself when you experience a big emotion? Our actions (whether we like it or not) model for our children how to process and respond to challenges and setbacks.
When parents take the time and make an effort to understand how this all feels for teenagers, while modelling healthy coping strategies and self-regulation tools, they can help their child or young person to take ownership of challenging and overwhelming emotions, and move through adolescence as smoothly as possible.
Primary Care Child and Family Psychology Service are delivering an online parenting workshop on “You, Your Teen and Big Emotions” on 16th November, 10.00-11.30am. This workshop is for parents, caregivers or guardians of children aged 0 – 10. To attend contact Miranda (087-6776096) or Elisha (087-9734925).
This article was written Miranda Comar, Psychology Assistant with HSE Primary Care Child and Family Psychology Service. The Child and Family Psychology Service are members of Parenting Limerick. [...]
Supporting Positive Perinatal Mental HealthNovember 2, 2023Homepage Display / PregnancyOur guide to supporting positive perinatal mental health: Having a new baby is a wonderful and exciting experience. It can also be an emotional rollercoaster with most expectant and new parents feeling anxiety, stress, low mood, worry or exhaustion at some point. Below are some tips on how new and expectant parents can mind their own mental health and well-being.
All parents feel exhaustion during this time, and many also feel the “baby blues” for a short period of time. Let yourself express your feelings and don’t feel guilty if you are not feeling bliss at every moment. It is normal
Talk about your feelings and your experiences with your partner, a friend or family member. This will help you to know that you are not alone
Consider joining a breastfeeding support group or baby and toddler group. Meeting other new parents will help provide a support network and offer peer support
Accept any offers of help so that you can spend time with your baby and get some rest
Give yourself a break. If household chores must be done, break down big tasks and do a little bit at a time. Then, let yourself rest or spend time with your baby.
Try to keep active–getting out for a walk each day will help boost your mood. Baby yoga or baby massage classes can be a great way to get out and about and will help you bond with your baby.
If your feelings of depression, worry, anxiety or fear persist or are very intense, talk to your GP or PHN as soon as possible. You may be one of the 15-25 % of women who suffer from perinatal mental health problems. Help is out there, and getting support will ensure that you bond with your baby and enjoy those amazing and exhausting early days.
[...]
Giving the Gift of GratitudeNovember 2, 2023Homepage Display / Quality TimeThe gift of Gratitude: With Halloween in the rear view mirror all the shops and supermarkets are already gearing up for Christmas. For many parents this can be a really difficult time of year when budgets are stretched to breaking point. Ads are already starting to kick in and once we hit the ever more pervasive Black Friday at the end of November, we’ll wonder will it every let up. It is increasingly impossible to avoid the hype of this Black Friday every year, and the constant temptations all packaged in the once in a lifetime opportunity to save, save, save. A good bargain on something you really need or want is a great thing; but all the hype can create desires and needs we didn’t even know we had. This can be especially true for children who haven’t fully learned to distinguish between what they want and what they need and may not fully understand the value (and the limitations) of money.
So, while Black Friday will be everywhere, that other American tradition at the end of November, Thanksgiving, is increasingly less visible. Spending time with people that we love (or are at least related to), reaching out to those who may be alone or in need and really focusing on the good things in our life is much more likely to bring us happiness than rushing around shops buying lots of things. So, how do we instil this sense of gratitude in our children, especially as we head in to the busiest shopping season of the year?
Count your Blessings. Spend a few minutes each day talking with your children about what you are both grateful for. This may include their new PS5, but ask them to think about other things such as your family, a warm house, a special friend, the chance to take music lessons, a kind teacher…
Model gratitude. Practice expressing gratitude yourself and catch yourself if you are focusing on the negative or things that you don’t have. This doesn’t mean ignoring the real problems or challenges that you may be facing-it just means telling your children regularly how grateful you are to have them in your life and noticing the positive things
Let Your child give something back. Whether this is giving money to charity, participating in a toy appeal, visiting neighbours or giving your time to support a good cause, let your child understand that they are part of a wider family and community and that they have important contributions to make. Let them experience the real and lasting joy that giving can bring
Manage expectations. Make sure that your child knows that a Santa list is a wish list—it doesn’t mean that Santa will bring them Start a conversation about what your child really wants and why—this will help them figure out those things that are important to them
Focus on experiences rather than things. Of course there will be presents, but the things that children will really remember are the special things that you all did together as a family. Create some special traditions in the run-up to the holidays—these don’t have to cost much or anything at all: hot chocolate and a special Christmas movie, an evening walk to look at the lights, special music and food as you decorate the tree; the possibilities are endless.
This article was contributed a member of Parenting Limerick.
[...]
Stress Free Midterm BreakOctober 26, 2023Home Life / Homepage DisplayYour Cheat Sheet for a Stress Free Midterm Break
With every school year calendar comes the promise of ‘getting organised’. Knowing what dates the children are off, you vow to line up your own time off, book camps, organise fun activities and declutter some over-stocked bedrooms. Before you know it though, the break arrives along with the pressure to think of something fun EVERY DAY. As Hallowe’en approaches, here are a few ideas to help with your midterm plans:
– Days out aren’t just for the summer. Beach and hill walks in the autumn can be incredibly invigorating (once you’re all geared up), as can picnic in Curragh Chase. Use that carved out pumpkin flesh to make some soup, fill up the thermos and head to your nearest woods. Younger children can try to find that elusive Gruffalo, while older ones can enjoy the basics of orienteering.
– Hotel breaks are expensive. A great alternative is to ‘house hop’ with friends in other counties. You head to them for an overnight stay and then they arrange to come to you. Costs are kept low, children will enjoy each other’s company and you get to catch up with friends who have existed only via text or Facebook for quite a while.
– Support local spots and events. A lot are free or relatively low cost and can introduce you to things on your doorstep that you never realised existed. King John’s Castle, St. Mary’s Cathedral, the Art Gallery and the Hunt Museum are great places to spend a morning or afternoon. It makes learning fun and most will have some spooky-themed activities going on. Again, small children can let their imaginations run wild and some reluctant teenagers may even find their history projects brought to life. You’re out and together, that’s the important thing.
– Hallowe’en make and do. Sure, you can buy costumes and decorations but a morning spent on some DIY spiders, masks and capes is fun and creates memories.
– Take some space: Time off together can also be stressful. Maybe you’re used to breaks at work and your children are out of routine so beware of being on top of each other! As much as you value the time together, carving out some alone time is just as important during breaks (for you and your child).
For lots more ideas go to www.limerick.ie/discover/eat-see-do/festivals/halloween
This article was contributed a member of Parenting Limerick.
[...]
Developmental Language DisorderOctober 19, 2023Homepage Display / Learning to TalkThis Friday October 20th you may see some buildings lightening in purple and wonder why. The reason? Well, purple is the global colour associated with the most common childhood disorder you have probably never heard of. The goal of this campaign us to change all that and highlight International Developmental Language Disorder Day which falls on the 20th October.
Learning to talk is easy for most children but for some, it can be tricky. Developmental Language Disorder (DLD) is a hidden but common condition that is estimated to affect about two students in every class of 30. DLD is as common as dyslexia and more common than autism, yet many people are unaware of it. Thus, the description of it as the most common childhood condition you’ve probably never heard of.
DLD is a persisting difficulty with understanding and/or using spoken language. Children with DLD will be slower than other children to develop vocabulary and long sentences, even though they typically have average intelligence and lots of language learning opportunities.
The cause of DLD is not known but we do know it is not caused by
emotional difficulties
medical conditions
autism
limited exposure to language.
People with autism may also find language difficult but they do not have DLD. For children with DLD who speak more than one language, both/all of their languages will be affected. A child with DLD may have other challenges also, such as dyslexia, speech sound difficulties and/or Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).
Children with DLD will all be different. Some children with DLD will struggle with:
Putting the words together to say what they want to say
Listening, understanding, following instructions or remembering what has been said
Understanding or using vocabulary/Learning new words
Telling a story
Remembering words, even if they know it very well
Understanding jokes or sarcasm.
Your child may appear to withdraw at school, can seem anxious or ‘act out’ due to not understanding or becoming frustrated.
There are many ways of supporting your child with DLD. A speech and language therapist can assess language skills, diagnose DLD as appropriate and provide support. Support from professionals including speech and language therapists (SLTs) and teachers can make a significant difference to the lives of children with DLD and they can go on to achieve success academically and socially.
Parents know their children’s strengths and needs better than anyone. If you have any concerns around your child’s language development and would like further information or advice, please contact your local HSE speech and language therapist at your nearest primary care centre.
This article was contributed by the Primary Care Speech & Language Therapy Team from HSE Midwest Community Health Care on behalf of Parenting Limerick.
[...]
Child Development through PlayOctober 12, 2023Homepage Display / Middle ChildhoodChildren are born with a natural desire to play and explore. It is through this important “work” that they develop skills and learn about the world around them. As a parent you play the most important role in helping and encouraging your child’s play and exploration. Play is crucial to brain development andsupports the development of attention, concentration, motor skills, social skills and language. Play also helps to buildchildren’s resilience. Resilient children have a more secure and positive view of themselves and the world, as well as more adaptive coping skills when faced with stress and challenges. Play is a key feature in helping children learn about emotions as well as how to manage them. Young children cannot regulate their own emotions and so they rely on parents to co-regulate with them. This can be done duringplay when a child gets big emotions e.g. anger, or frustration. A parent that models a calm emotion-regulating response during this time is teaching their child to understand, accept and manage these big emotions.
Play provides space to develop a secure parent-child relationship which is essential to early development. Children respond best when their parent is fully engaged with them. Being fully engaged with your child means avoiding distractions particularly your mobile phone, and being fully attentive to them. Sit facing your child when you play and make eye contact. Your child loves to see your face and your emotions reactions. Follow their lead and their interests; be curious about what they are doing and incorporate nurturing touch such as hugs, a rub on the back or a special handshake. Talk to your child using simple language during play. This shows them that you are interest and tuned into what they are doing and such narrative is important for the development oflanguage skills.
The need to play and communicate begins at birth andcontinues right through life. A baby that is smiling, gigglingand looking at their parents’ face is playing and learning. Play changes as the child grows and looks different at different ages and stages. Between the ages of 0 and 4, sensory andmessy play allows the child to explore using touch, sight, smells and sounds. Messy play is not always the easiest for parents but it is incredibly important for eye-hand coordination and motor skills. Tough as it may seem, try to grin and bear the play-doh, paints, gloop, magic sand etc. and tackle the mess later when the valuable learning experience is over.
Around the age of 4 or 5 years, narrative play takes centre stage. Children use stories and characters, like the princess or superhero, to explore and retell scenarios. They may use their imagination to immerse themselves in the story. Role play allows children to take on roles they see in everyday life;mum, dad, teacher, doctor etc. All of these types of narrativeplay encourage children to think about and consider othersperspectives. They encourage the exploration of cause and effect as well as problem solving and the development of empathy.
As children get older they develop more independence in their play. They enjoy social play with peers and going to friends’ houses. With this play, they are learning to understand and adjust to social norms and rules, co-operate and negotiate with others, as well as developing their listening, communication and problem-solving skills. Although independence should be supported, children will still seek out parental involvement and support at times. Be ready when called on!
Primary Care Child and Family Psychology Service, incollaboration with ABC Start Right Limerick, are delivering an online parenting workshop on “The Power of Supporting Your Child’s Development Through Play” on 17th October, 10.00-11.30am. This workshop is for parents, caregivers or guardians of children aged 0 – 10. To attend contact Miranda (087-677-6096) or Elisha (087-9734925).
This article was written by Elisha Minihan, Psychology Assistant with HSE Primary Care Child and Family Psychology Service. The Child and Family Psychology Service are members of Parenting Limerick. [...]
Top Tips for Avoiding Winter HibernationOctober 5, 2023Homepage Display / Quality TimeAvoiding Winter Hibernation.
As the nights draw in and the days seem shorter, we’re all about cosy fires and fleece pyjamas. The colder weather, however, shouldn’t be a carte blanche for abandoning healthy habits. Instead, add some fun twists in line with the new season:
Autumn walks mean beautiful colours and crunchy leaves – take some time every day to either walk, cycle or scoot with your children. There’s a freshness in the air that makes being outdoors really enjoyable.
While we’re all about healthy treats, we also know that hot chocolate and fires are an autumn/winter delight. Maybe mark the weekend by making hot drinks together and taking the time to chat about your week.
Hallowe’en preparation can be great fun when you use natural materials. Start gathering bendy sticks and leaves for garlands and you have a fun project that yourself and your child can work on together over the coming weeks.
Try not to get caught in the telly trap, where longer evenings seem to warrant hours on the couch. Board games, stories and charades are always great fun, and can provide hours of laughter and friendly competition.
Keep Christmas in perspective. The ads are starting to creep in and shop displays are popping up so try to keep your child focused on the here and now. Remind them that Christmas only starts in December and that there are so many other fun things to do before then.
[...]
Celebrating GrandparentsOctober 5, 2023Homepage Display / Quality TimeInter-generational Buddies: Celebrating Grandparents
As parents, one of our subconscious fears seems to be that we are turning into our own parents. When you hear something your own mother used to say repeatedly throughout your childhood coming out of your own mouth, the realisation dawns – she wasn’t being mean, she was just being a parent. As clichéd as it sounds, it really only is when you become a parent/guardian yourself that you realise what your parents did for you. They walked the floors and soothed you as you cried and they guided you through tantrums, homework and heartbreak. October 1st marked the United Nations International Day of the Older Person so what better time to reflect on the role of grandparents and other significant older people in your child’s life?
The relationship between a grandparent and grandchild is often described as one of privilege. Grandparents talk about being able to ‘spoil’ grandchildren with treats, without having to discipline them, with the added bonus of being able to ‘hand them back’. We often find it hard to reconcile the memory of strict parents with these far more relaxed, fun-loving grandparents! The trick is to relish that difference and to encourage the two generations – the one above you and the one behind you – to spend quality time together and to learn from each other. Many older people may be at the point in their lives where they are working less or may even be retired so they have time to spend with children. A crèche or school-pick is a great way to provide an insight into your child’s life, plus the novelty of having Granny or Grandad coming to school is always exciting to small children. Try to think beyond the babysitting role that so many grandparents play and look at ways to actively support your child’s relationship with your own parents. It could be going to the library to find a book that they used to read to you as a child that they can now share with their grandchild. Maybe it’s baking something together, or walking together around favourite Limerick places. The possibilities are endless but the interaction between them is priceless.
In addition to grandparents, encouraging your children to enjoy relationships with older people is important. Whether it’s some morning banter with an older neighbour on the way to school or attending cultural events that celebrate positive ageing (photography exhibitions, sales of work etc.), modelling respect and interaction gives your child very important life skills. It teaches them that diversity includes age – we meet people from all walks of life and, as older people have lived longer, they remember things that we have never known. Take a 7 year-old who is obsessed with Penneys, for example. An older person could tell them that it used to be called Cannock’s and explain why the clock was installed there. Or they might explain how shops like Penneys didn’t exist in their childhoods, so instead they learnt how to sew, mend and embellish their own clothes. That could be a shared interest that develops into a little project of its own.
Inter-generational relationships benefit all those involved. It’s about stepping away from stereotypical images of knitting grandmothers and walking stick –wielding grandfathers. It’s about valuing a space where two age groups can share experiences and provide each other with an insight into a different generation. One might prefer a newspaper over a Kindle and the other may refuse to believe that there was ever a time when Santa only brought oranges but the sharing of those stories is the basis of a very special relationship.
This article was contributed by a member of Parenting Limerick. [...]
Responding to your Child’s DiagnosisSeptember 30, 2023Ability / Homepage Displayhttps://loveparenting.ie/who-are-we/So your child has just been diagnosed with a chronic illness or disability and you just feel as if the rug has been pulled out from under you. It is likely that you are very emotional; angry at the diagnosis and how it has come to be; grieving that their life is now different and that your hopes and dreams for them are demolished; jealous of other parents whose children are ‘normal’; and feeling confused and alone because you don’t know where to turn to for help.
This time is one of the most stressful times you and your family will experience. How parents cope with a diagnosis will vary wildly and often coping will be an ongoing process with many ups and downs. Situations like this can put even the most solid relationships under tremendous strain. It is important to remember you will get through this, it just will take time.
There are lots of different strategies parents can use to help themselves and their families through this. Working out what strategy works for you is part of the coping process, so you may have to try different approaches until you find what works best. This is what I have learned.
Focus on self-care as well as you can.
Often when stressed self-care is the first thing to go. You will have heard about the importance of putting on your oxygen mask before helping others when on a plane. It’s the same here and it is not selfish. By looking after yourself you will ensure that you are in the best position possible to look others.
Give yourself permission to feel your feelings, especially the really challenging ones. Be kind to yourself. Avoid negative self-talk where possible. You are doing your best. Family and friends can be great supports, so don’t forget to lean on them. But remember sometimes we may need professional supports like a counsellor to help us see the wood from the trees.
Give other family members permission too! You and your partner may deal with your emotions differently at different times. Try to give each other space to do so, and do not judge one another’s way of coping. Talk to one another as much you can. The same goes for other family members. Being able to tell your family and friends about what is going on will make things easier, as you will not have to put on a front about how you are managing.
Learn about your child’s condition: It is likely that the first time you got the diagnosis you went into a tail spin and heard nothing that was said. Where possible bring a second person to appointments to help ask questions and take notes. Do some research online, but make sure that they are good sites. Don’t assume all information online is correct. Check out if there are any local support groups (some are available on social media too). Maybe your health professional can recommend a parent who has had a similar diagnosis that you can hear how they managed. The aim here is that you realise you are not alone and are equipped with good information on how best to meet your child needs.
Remember your child is more than their conditionYour natural instinct may be to wrap them in cotton wool but now more than ever you need to allow them to live as normally as other children their age. We know that children are resilient so give them space to find their own path.
Ask about financial support Chronic illnesses and disability can put a financial strain on families. Ask questions, find out what is available, and become fully informed about what supports your family is able to access.
Try not to cross bridges! If you stay in the present as much as possible, you will be better able to manage what will become your new “normality” and make sure to enjoy the happy moments.
This article was contributed by Tusla Limerick PPFS team, a member of Parenting Limerick. [...]
Top tips for cutting yourself some slackSeptember 30, 2023Health & Welbeing / Homepage DisplayTop Tips
• Honesty is the best policy: Parenting isn’t all rainbows and unicorns so don’t be afraid to tell people that you’re tired, anxious, frustrated etc. You will benefit from saying it out loud and your friend/colleague may share similar thoughts. Think of it as your very own parenting support group (because we all need them).
• Remember that social media is a moment in time:Nothing strikes at the heart of an exhausted pyjama-wearing new mom with spew in her hair like an Instagram picture of a celebrity in a bikini, cradling her new baby waffling on about how #blessed she feels. We’d all feel blessed if we had a personal trainer, make-up artist and chef.
• You are your own worst critic: Nobody else notices or cares that your house is a mess or that you haven’t sent out ‘thank you’ cards yet. They think that you’re doing a great job – you just have to think the same.
• Your baby/child thinks that you’re amazing: You are everything to them. Soak up all that unconditional love and remember every parent still needs an ‘L’ plate because the learning never ends. [...]
Surviving Children’s Birthday PartiesSeptember 21, 2023Home Life / Homepage DisplayIn an era where throwing children’s parties seem to have grown out of all proportion, reduce your stress level with a few handy pointers:
Keep it in perspective – yes you want to celebrate your child and ensure they have a great time, but you also don’t want them to develop unrealistic expectations about what a birthday actually is
Set a budget – let your child know that the sky isn’t the limit by helping you to prioritise what is needed and what isn’t
Have a game plan – Play, food, opening presents, games is a good sequence for a 2-3 hour party
Balance the goodies – Parties don’t have to be equated with junk food. Yes, you can offer treats but do they all need to be of the glow-in-the-dark, sugar-coated variety? Small muffins, popcorn, cordial instead of fizz, plain chocolate – you can peel it back without sacrificing the ‘treats’ element
Bring in back-up – Friends or family that are willing to help out means that there are eyes on all children (excited, sugar-fuelled children have a tendency to wander)
Set clear pick-up times – A loose ‘around 5pm’ could be interpreted as any time before 6, so be exact about times during drop-off
Provided by Maria O’Dwyer ABC Start Right [...]
Is this Good Enough?September 14, 2023Home Life / Homepage DisplayYou may have heard the term “good enough” parenting before, but it’s not always clear what it actually means. And, good enough when we are feeling strong, healthy and in control can look and feel very different from good enough when we are feeling exhausted, stressed or anxious. “Good enough” parenting recognises the fact that being a parent is an incredibly challenging (though often very rewarding) role and that no one is perfect and gets it right all the time.
It is an acknowledgement that most of us are doing our very best to be the loving, nurturing, secure parents that we know our children need. It is also an acknowledgement that we are only human and sometimes life, whether through illness, relationship difficulties, worry and stress about jobs and money, anxiety or depresses ion, etc. can leave us feeling depleted and really struggling to parent the way that we want.
This is when “good enough” really comes into play, and below are some things to consider when you find yourself in those really difficult parenting moments when you are not sure that you can do it.
Give yourself a break. Take a deep breath and let yourself feel your feelings. You aren’t the first parent to feel this way and you won’t be the last. Try to find some time for you—whether that is a bath, a chat on the phone with someone who makes you laugh or an early bed time with a good book
Take shortcuts. When you arrive home after a long day, launching into an evening routine of homework, dinner, baths and bedtime may seem insurmountable. Try to break it down in to what must be done, what should be done and what could be done. Set the kids up at the table to get on with some homework, while you chat to them and prepare a simple meal. It’s not for every night, but a simple picnic of sandwiches and fruit while snuggled on the couch might give everyone the break they need
Get cosy and cuddle. When you or your children are feeling stressed and overwhelmed, taking some time out for lots of cuddles and down time can make a difference. Making a nest on the couch, cuddling in and watching a movie can give you both lovely time with your children and a chance to relax and unwind
Go to Bed. Try to get as much sleep as you can—it makes such a difference to your energy and your ability to manage stress and to make healthy choices
Tomorrow is another day. If things didn’t go to plan today, take a deep breath, acknowledge what happened and know that you have another chance tomorrow.
This article was contributed by a member of Parenting Limerick.
[...]
Top Tips on Talking to Your Child’s TeacherSeptember 14, 2023Back to School / Homepage DisplayIt may be a scheduled parent-teacher meeting, a chat at collection time or a request from the teacher to discuss “some issues”. Whatever the reason, meeting with your child’s teacher(s) can sometimes be a bit daunting. Here are some tips to help you prepare.
1. Talk to your Child. Ask them how they feel about school, what they like and what they don’t like. Be positiveabout the meeting and let them know it is all about helping them
2. Get some support if you need it. Some parents may have had negative experiences of school themselves; it canhelp to ask a trusted friend, neighbour or professional to talk through the process or even accompany you if you are very nervous
3. Write down the key questions or issues so that you make sure that you cover everything
4. Be Positive. There may be a temptation for the teacher or you to start to address any issues or problems first. Try to redirect the conversation so that you start on positive points. Share information about what your child enjoys about school (“She really loves… art class, making up stories, maths group, etc.) and ask the teacher to do the same
5. If you do need to address specific issues or challenges, try to stay calm, listen to what is being said and make sure that your points are heard
6. End on a positive. Even if you had a challengingmeeting, try to end the meeting by identifying positive things about your child’s experiences of school andagree specific ways that you and your teacher can work together to support your child. [...]
Healthy Snack IdeasSeptember 10, 2023Tips on Healthy EatingGetting children to eat healthy snacks is hard, but don’t worry there’s many ways to encourage children to eat more healthy snacks. Here are Love Parenting’s top healthy snack ideas.
✮ Chunks of raw vegetables and fruit
✮ A small sandwich
✮ Yogurt or fromage frais
✮ Dried fruit
✮ Dry roasted nuts (not for children under the age of 5)
✮ Scone or bagel
✮ Plain popcorn
✮ Cheese cubes or fingers
✮ Bread/toast and jam or peanut butter
✮ Breakfast cereal and milk
✮ Crackers
So your child won’t drink milk?
Try…
✮ A bowl of breakfast cereal with milk
✮ Cheese on crackers
✮ Fruit salad with yogurt
✮ A mug of hot chocolate
✮ A slice of pizza or lasagna
✮ A fruit smoothie or milkshake
✮ Baked potato with grate cheese
✮ Custard or milk pudding
✮ A toasted cheese or cheesy pasta bake
✮ Cheese slices, triangles or strings
✮ Chunks of cheese in crispy salad
✮ Fish with white sauce
✮ Muesli with natural yogurt
✮ A cheese board with crackers and fruit
Taken from “Your Child’s Heart” magazine published by Irish heart Foundation (www.irishheart.ie) ‘The Irish Heart Foundation is the national charity fighting heart disease and stroke. We support, educate and train people to save lives, campaign for patients, promote positive health programmes, fund research and provide vital information. We need your support through donations, as a volunteer or on our training courses’ [...]
Back to School AnxietySeptember 7, 2023Back to School / Homepage DisplaySchool has been back for a couple of days now. Some children can become anxious around this time of year when they do return to school, particularly so in this post covid world. All children experience some level of anxiety. Some of the signs include agitation, restlessness, inattention or poor focus, physical symptoms like headaches or stomach aches, withdrawal, or tantrums. Sometimes, your child might even refuse to engage in an activity they once enjoyed. Our role as parents and carers is to understand this anxiety and help children to overcome it.
Why does this happen? Signals in the child’s brain perceive a threat or danger (even if there is none). Your child may be worried about changing teacher, the increased homework, or starting a new school. The body is then flooded with a stress hormone (cortisol), which causes a child to react in a certain way. The key is to regulate this part of the brain through sensory engagement, calming supports and thinking strategies.
An important way to support your child if they are feeling anxious is to ensure they feel connected and safe. Research tells us that children need 12 physical touches/connections to feel connected to a parent in one day. So give plenty of hugs and cuddles, especially before and after transitions. I highly recommend 15 minutes of un-interrupted play time with your child per day. Let the child lead, and choose the game that they want to play with you.
Think of engaging all your children’s senses. Sensory and messy play is great to help regulate your child and could also be a great activity for you both. Tactile play with slime, play dough, or messy materials can be fun. Other sensory approaches may involve using lavender oils, which can have a calming effect, or citrus smells which can help uplift, if your child tends to disassociate or withdraw.
Encourage the use of your child’s imagination by getting them to draw or role play their worry. Help them challenge the “what if’s” (your child’s worry) always come to a positive conclusion and state how as a parent you will help the child overcome the worry.
When you play together, facilitate empowerment and confidence by creating little challenges that the child can overcome, “woah, you didn’t think that you could do that and you did it!” I knew you could do it”.
Top tips for supporting anxiety in children
Children express anxiety and stress in variety of ways, from behaviour changes to bed-wetting, tantrums to withdrawal. While their expression of anxiety can be very varied, your response to it needs to be consistent:
Encourage expression: When you’re child says ‘I’m scared’ or ‘I’m worried’ try not to respond with ‘no you’re not, you’re a brave girl’ etc. Let them explain their fear/anxiety and then talk it through together.
Encourage your child to face their fears: Let them know that you will be right there by their side. If it’s a fear of the dark, hold their hand as they enter a dark room. If its separation anxiety, give then something small of yours (a photo, keyring etc.) to keep with then until you’re back. They don’t always need you, they just need reassurance that you’re coming back.
Teach them that perfection is a myth: Whether it’s colouring outside the lines or not doing too well in a game or test, always try to reiterate that everybody has strengths and weaknesses. Knowing that it’s ok to not be the best at everything is a really important life lesson for children and it builds resilience for adulthood.
Show them how to take time out: An over-scheduled child can become an anxious child. Be a role model – take breaks from your work, leave your phone on silent for set periods of time and just hang out together. Down time helps the mind and body to relax but children have to be taught to value that rather than seeing it as ‘boring’.
This article was contributed by Claudia Maloccas, Play Therapist with Hospital FRC, a member of Parenting Limerick. [...]
September is the New ‘New Year’ for ParentsSeptember 2, 2023Back to School / Homepage DisplaySeptember is the New ‘New Year’ for Parents: There is always something very unrealistic about January and resolutions. After the madness of Christmas, there is an expectation that all bad habits and choices will just stop instantly. The ‘new year, new you’ mantra, however, generally fizzles out within a few weeks and before you know it, you’re back eating too much chocolate! The academic year – from September to June – dictates much of our parenting schedule. We know that, for those months, our daily routines consist of organising childcare arrangements, being chauffeurs and standing on the side-lines of fields, sports halls, dance studios and every other imaginable after-school activity. The start of another academic year is a great opportunity to reflect on yourself and your parenting style and maybe to introduce some new habits that will support both of those things. You have sent your children back to school with shiny new uniforms, nourishing lunches and optimism about the new year ahead of them – now take some time to do those kind of things for yourself.
Reflecting on what we say and what we do is a very personal thing. For some people, it comes naturally. Others have to make the time to consciously look back and think about what they did and if they could have done it differently. Think of an argument with your child, for example. You were tired, they were unreasonable and it ended with you raising your voice and frog-marching them to their room. There are two usual solutions to this common scenario; you can sit your child down, apologise for your reaction and encourage them to reflect on their part in it. Or you can just ignore it, and pretend that it never happened. The time and space you take to reflect on these kind of things determine your parenting style.
Finding time to reflect is a tough call as your head fills with timetables, grocery lists, school fundraisers etc. Non-stop ‘to do’ lists can be very stressful so think about using your time more effectively. A common situation parents find themselves in is the wait while their child is in an activity. Sure, you can stand on the side-line week after week or you can use the hour to pick up some groceries. But what about using that time to create some headspace for yourself? Maybe go out to your car, set your alarm and have a nap or listen to a podcast. Or throw on your runners and go for a brisk walk. You’ll feel refreshed which will benefit both yourself and your child. When you’re more relaxed, the car journey home is less likely to be a list of instructions about dinner, homework and bedtime.
Another key to looking after yourself is to keep an eye on your own nutrition. How many of us sneak the treats when our children aren’t looking, because we spend so much time explaining the importance of healthy choices to them? A great rule to follow is that if you wouldn’t give it to your toddler to eat, you shouldn’t be eating it yourself. When you’re packing your child’s healthy lunch box, pack your own. Small changes will make a big difference to your energy and reserves. So, head into the new academic year with renewed focus and energy and you’ll be surprised at how parenting becomes a little easier.
This article was contributed by a member of Parenting Limerick. Parenting Limerick is a network of parenting and family support organisations. [...]
Minding our own Mental HealthAugust 26, 2023Health & Welbeing / Homepage DisplayThe demands of day-to-day life can create stress, which in turn can lead to mental health difficulties and result in parents and carers feeling as though they are unable to cope. With the return to school looming large and the cost of living crisis hitting a lot of families hard, it is important, that we can manage how we respond to events in life.
For many parents and carers, the idea of self-care and of taking some well-deserved ‘you’ time can seem like an alien concept. Parents and carers often worry that if they take some time out for themselves they are being selfish. To the contrary, it is important that parents and carers continue to explore and engage their own passions and interests where possible. This can help to ensure your identity as an individual remains intact – and happy parents often make for happier kids.
Taking time out for yourself by choosing to, for example, go for a walk, take a bath, catch up with a friend, or pursue your interests, sends a very positive message to your child/ren about the importance of taking care of yourself. Role modelling positive self-care also demonstrates to your child a powerful strategy for managing any stress they might experience. How we react to stress will influence how our children react to stress.
We can all feel pressure at different times in our lives. Having responsibility for a child or children can present extra challenges to a parent or carer’s mental health. These challenges may include worry, fear, a lack of knowledge, a feeling of being overwhelmed, loneliness and more.
Each stage of parenting brings with it its own set of demands. When children are infants, parents and carers experience sleepless nights due to teething or any other number of issues. When children grow into teenagers and gain a degree of independence, parents and carers may experience sleepless nights until their children return from discos and late-night socialising.
Social media and how we interact with it can have a big influence on how we view ourselves. While many parents and carers find parenting blogs and social media influencers (who share their experience of parenting) beneficial, some may find themselves negatively comparing themselves and their parenting abilities. Remember that challenges associated with life and parenting can be under-represented by influencers who wish to present content which is purely positive.
It is important to know that support is available to any parent, carer or individual who may find life, or parenting, overwhelming and may experience stress, or mental health difficulties. Further support and information is available at www.yourmentalhealth.ie. If you are concerned about your mental health, contact your GP for an individual consultation.
Top Tips for Minding Your Mental Health
Get enough sleep: When we are not fully rested, it is more difficult for us to manage our emotions. Our response to daily challenges and things that would not normally annoy or irritate us could mean we find it more difficult to cope.
Eat healthily: At times of stress, we might lose our appetite while others reach for the sugary snacks. This is because stress affects our hormones and this in turn influences what we choose to eat. Try to make healthy choices and eat regularly.
Relax regularly: you may be a parent, but you are still you. Your role as a parent is just one aspect of your life. Rest and relaxation is good for the soul as well as the body. For some people, relaxing might involve taking some time out to read a book, take a bath or practice some yoga or meditation exercises
Exercise: this releases endorphins, which make us feel in better form. People who exercise regularly can experience benefits including a boost in their mood. Taking exercise can be as simple as going for a 30-minute walk.
Join a social club: Feeling connected with other people can help us to feel a sense of solidarity. Joining a club may not be for everyone. If it’s not for you, why not explore other ways to help you feel socially connected – such as meeting a friend for coffee?
Keep in touch with friends and family: there is truth in the proverb that ‘a problem shared is a problem halved’. Having a friend or family member who will listen to you and support you can help you to realise that you are not alone.
This article was contributed by a member of Parenting Limerick. [...]
Primary School TransitionsAugust 17, 2023Homepage Display / Pre-School AgeSchool Transitions: From Preschool to Primary School
Moving on from preschool to primary school can be daunting for children and parents alike. There are no two ways about it! Educators work tirelessly to ensure preschoolers are ready to make the big step. As parents, there are many things we can do to help. At the same time, it is important to reduce stress and be realistic about what we can and cannot do at home.
Reach out to your child`s preschool. Your child`s preschool educator will have resources to support your child’s transition. If you are not already in touch, make contact. They are likely to have valuable advice, school readiness resources, or suggestions for activities to carry out at home with your child.
Link in with the school. In the same way as the preschool educator can support the transition, so too can your child`s new school. Your child`s new school will send information about the school. It is important that these new school systems are understood and explained so that children know what to expect.
Talk to your child about school. This will help to prepare them and help getting used to the idea. If you can’t bring them to show them their new school, try making a photo book so your child will know what the school looks like, where they will have their lunch, and all the fun and exciting activities they can look forward to!
Read books and tell stories about starting school. Try reading a positive story together about a child starting school. to support your child to feel secure and excited about this new adventure. Better still, talk about how excited you were when you started school and about the activities that you did, the games you played and the friends that you made.
Talk about how all of this feels. This is a stressful time, and the transition may bring additional pressure on children and their families. It is important to provide space for children to talk about how they are feeling. By talking through situations, children make sense of it all and learn to manage their emotions.
Practice self care skills. Take this time to support your child to develop some independence around self care skills. Your child will have a better experience in school if they can open their lunchbox, close their shoes, wash and dry their hands, put on and take off their coat, and ask for help.
Try a routine. Routines brings security, so now more than ever, they are really important. Try getting back to a somewhat normal routine at home, particularly around bedtime and waking up time. Ensuring a healthy amount of sleep as well as exercise will support your child`s health and well-being in school. To reduce stress, keep routines relaxed and playful.
Play, play and more play! In play, children have many opportunities to learn skills that can support them when they start school. Play helps to enrich your child`s learning as they develop and master expression, confidence, creative thinking and problem solving. Playing games with family members can help your child develop social skills, as well as learn about team work, taking turns and negotiation. Role play using teddies and dolls allows children to explore the experience. Acting out what starting school might be like helps your child make sense of this milestone they are about to embark on.
This article was contributed by ABC Start Right, a member of Parenting Limerick. [...]
A Parents Countdown to SchoolAugust 4, 2023Back to School / Homepage DisplayCountdown to School
Now:
Check in on how your child is feeling about school. Excited, anxious, nervous? Remember you don’t have to have all the answers. Just listen.
If you qualify, apply for back to school allowance
Buy books, uniforms and shoes and put them away safely
Begin to introduce sleep, food and daily routines. Agree this together with your children.
Encourage your child to connect in with their pals
In the two weeks before:
Continue the chat with your child about going back to school. Even little things like what they would like in their school lunches can start deeper chats
Take time out for yourself.
Get support from others if needed
Do something fun together
Put uniforms on hangers and visibly display in bedrooms
Set up school bags and agree where the school shoes/bags are kept after school
Night before:
Check that uniforms/shoes/bags are where they should be
Get children to help make their lunches
Stay calm and relax. You can do it!
Don’t forget to praise your child! [...]
Getting back into RoutinesAugust 4, 2023Back to School / Homepage DisplayThe summer months have inevitably involved letting some of our good routines slide. If you are like me your teenage children are sleeping in until all hours and are often the ones turning off the lights at an ungodly hour! Others will admit to the fridge constantly being open with a ‘help yourself if you’re hungry’ approach. For others screen time, play time, bath time and sleep time are all over the shop. BUT, the return to school is coming fast. If you are like me, this fills me with dread as I now have to address all these established habits. So what can we do?
When routines are in place children feel more secure. Parents feel calmer and more in control. By adjusting our summer routine, it will help children understand that the summer is coming to an end and help prepare them for the return of school. Easier said than done right? Where do you start?
Begin by having plan in your own head about what routines you would like to see happen. Agree this with your partner to ensure you don’t have mixed messages. Set a time to have the chat about routines with your child. Get their views on this and agree a plan together. Make sure that they understand the plan. Remember Rome wasn’t built in a day so put the plan into place gradually, making small adjustments daily. Talk to your child to see if the plan is working and make changes if they are needed.
Bedtimes will be the first on my list. It won’t be easy as it is still bright at 9pm, but It needs to be done. Start by adjusting bedtimes gradually. Two weeks before the first day of school, start to move your child’s bedtime earlier at night. Wake them a small bit earlier each morning. Continue this process every night until your child is waking at the same time that will be necessary once school starts.
Aim to create a relaxing wind-down routine. For about an hour before you want the lights turned off for the night encourage calming activities. For younger children this might be taking a bath or reading a book together. For older children this could be listening to music, taking a shower or meditation. By repeating this every night in the weeks leading up to the first day of school it will help your child to anticipate sleep time, making it easier for everyone once school starts again.
Next up, screen time. We know that less screen time before bed will improve the quality of their sleep. Yes, they love playing with their friends on line and who doesn’t enjoy a game of Mario Cart? They can still do this, but – earlier in the day. Aim for no screen time an hour before your child goes to sleep. Avoid screens in their bedroom. Watch those smart phones too. Agreeing a plan in advance on technology will prevent problems and fighting in the long run.
Last but not least mealtimes. Plan to adjust mealtimes gradually in August to match up with school lunch breaks. Chat about the importance of eating well. Encourage your child to think of food as fuel for their body. Involve them in decisions about what they eat, the weekly shop, meal planning and preparation.
So we have a plan. One day at a time and the hard work will pay off. Don’t forget that you are doing a great job in a very difficult time. Good luck!
This article was written by the Tusla Prevention, Partnership and Family Support team, a member of Parenting Limerick. [...]
Breastfeeding: The Importance of Supportive PartnersAugust 3, 2023Home Life / Infants & Babies / PregnancyThe benefits of breastfeeding are both immediate and lifelong – it provides on-tap nutrition as and when baby needs it and creates the building blocks of brain development and immunity that will carry your child through life. The fact that something is natural doesn’t mean that it comes naturally or is easy and breastfeeding is no exception. It takes practice and persistence and, more importantly, it takes support. If your partner, friend or relative is breastfeeding, there are a few things that you can do to make things a little easier for her. Some of these tips are also worth bearing in mind when you’re sitting beside a breast-feeding mom in a café. Sometimes all she might need is an understanding smile or a nod (rather than the downcast eye because you think looking in her direction could be perceived as creepy or rude!).
It’s worth having a discussion before the baby arrives about what the expectations are. If your partner intends to breastfeed, she will be doing all the night feeds to begin with so talk about what you can do. By bathing baby every evening, for example, you will have some one-on-one time with them and your partner can take a nap. Plans made in advance usually run more smoothly than those made during periods of major changes and sleep deprivation! After baby has fed, if he needs to be winded or changed, that could be where you offer to step in. Never under-estimate the value of doing what seems like a mundane task or enabling your partner to have free hands, even if only for a few minutes. Acknowledge that it’s a tough job but she’s doing it brilliantly. It may seem like a moot point but when you’re bleary-eyed from tiredness and your body feels like it belongs to someone else, the smallest amount of praise can really spur you on.
Have a think about the physical things you can stay on top of for your partner or friend too. Keep her topped up with fresh water (think hangover thirst on a hot day – that’s how much hydration a breastfeeding mom requires), healthy snacks, comfortable pillows and within reach of TV remotes, books etc. Look up what you don’t understand – a quick google search can often yield a new insight when you or your partner are feeling a little overwhelmed.
Breastfeeding might all be new to you but the payoff is tremendous so invest some time and thought into supporting its ongoing success.
For quality-assured information on breastfeeding, log on to www.breastfeeding.ie
[...]
Praising your ChildJuly 24, 2023Homepage Display / Quality TimeGiving children positive feedback is a great way to encourage children to do their best. Praise is for behaviour that you would like to see more of. This works best when your praise comes from a place of respect and connection. Here are some ideas on how parents can usepraise to guide their youngsters towards positive behaviour.
Focus on actions and decisions.
Parents naturally want to praise children for having good character: kindness, intelligence, strength, creativity. Instead, try mentioning the action and decision they made. For example: “well done for noticing that your classmate forgot their lunch and sharing with them, that was very kind of you”.
Praise effort and hard work.
Children who only get praised for achievements will focus more on immediate rewards, and are more likely to give up if they think they might fail. Try praising effort instead: “I see you’re working really hard on this jigsaw, well done!” Children who are praised for their efforts are likely to try hard in future, and to not give up when things go wrong. This will encourage their persistence and ability to stick with difficult tasks.
Make praise specific.
Saying “good job,” even if the child feels disappointed, is a bit too vague for children to grasp. We need to describe what was positive about the behaviour for example you did a great job putting your toys in the box, putting your clothes in the wash basket etc. Moreover, children are naturally competitive, so it is important to help them see their progress. . Some goals take time, and children can easily lose interest. To keep motivation up, try praising the progress they have made. This can help children see how they have improved over time. For example: “wow, you are playing so much faster now than you were last month!”
Be honest when you praise.
Children can pick up on signs that their parents are just trying to make them feel good. If you overdo it, children might not feel they deserve it. By contrast, honest praise works better, because it is more credible.It means the world to children and makes them feel connected and encouraged.
Talk about how their hard work made you feel.
Introducing talk about your own feelings can make praise more meaningful. For instance, instead of saying “you did a great job,” try“I’m proud of you”. A self-critical child can debate the facts (e.g. I didn’t win the race), but it’s a lot harder to argue with how they made you feel. This again will foster a sense of connection and warmth.
This article was contributed by Limerick Primary Care Child and Family Psychology Service, a member of Parenting Limerick. [...]
Top Toilet Training TipsJuly 20, 2023Health & WelbeingIt can take children time to learn their body’s signals for when they need a wee and/or poo. Potty training can take weeks or months for some children, with many accidents along the way. Choose a time to begin toilet training that is right for you and for your child.
Your child may be ready for toilet training if:
They are able to follow instructions.
They can stay dry for 1 or 2 hours.
They start to notice when they have done a wee and/or poo.
Toileting Milestone
Typical Age
Toilet Trained (wees)
2 years – 5 years
Toilet Trained (poos)
2 – 4 years
Night-Time Trained
6 months after successful day time training
Toilet Training Tips for when your child is ready
Encourage your child to drink plenty of water. Water helps to soften poo and makes it easier to pass.
Use loose, easy clothing, such as elasticated trousers and underwear.
Allow your child to choose a potty and/or a toileting step. When your child has a bowel movement in their nappy, allow them to watch you put it into the potty/toilet so that they can see where it should go. You can explain to them that this is where wee and poo belong (See Eric.org for useful resources).
Consistency is vital. You can use a timed approach or look out for signals and then place your child on the toilet/potty. Regularly ask your child if they need to use the toilet/potty.
Keep the toileting routine short and fun. Have fun things to play with on the toilet (e.g. a favourite book).
Give lots of praise and encouragement – especially just for your child’s efforts.
Remember to be patient, positive and upbeat. Accidents will happen, so clean them up and reassure your child. Never punish your child for accidents. [...]
ConstipationJuly 20, 2023Health & Welbeing / Homepage DisplayThe issue of constipation is something that many parents have to manage from time to time. When a child is experiencing constipation or withholding poo, it can cause distress for everyone in the family. It can start to feel as though the issue is dominating the family life. Reminding yourself that many parents experience this as stressful and that you are not alone can be reassuring for some parents. Progress can be very slow, so trying to remain patient and positive will be important in overcoming toileting issues.
How do I know if my child is constipated?
Constipation is the inability to do a poo regularly or to completely empty the bowel. Constipation is the most common bowel problem for children. Your child may be constipated if they poo less than 4 times a week, if they are avoiding going for a poo, or if they have a bloated tummy, or a lack of energy/appetite.
Why is my child constipated?
Your child may withhold poo because they have had painful bowel movements in the past and they are afraid it will hurt again when they poo- this is the most common cause of constipation. Some children might start withholding poo because they are not emotionally or physically ready to start using the toilet yet. Others may find the experience intimidating — the size, sounds and location of a toilet are sometimes overwhelming for a toddler. Your child may have developed a fear of the toilet or a negative association with toileting. Changes in routine can cause anxiety which can contribute to constipation in children (e.g. moving house, starting playschool). An unbalanced diet or insufficient fluid intake can also result in constipation.
How do I help?
It is important to visit your GP if your child is constipated as they will be able to best advise how to proceed. They may assess your child and, if necessary, prescribe medication to improve gut movement. Constipation can be treated with a combination of medications and/or behavioural interventions that best suit your child’s developmental stage. These could include:
Talk to your child about constipation: Talking to your child about how they are feeling about their constipation is really important. It is important to help them to understand what is going on in their body and how they can relieve their constipation. Make sure they know that they can talk to you about their toileting fears if they wish to do so, and that you can solve this together. As difficult as this can be, it is important to keep calm.
Healthy, balanced diet: Ensure your child is eating a balanced diet and drinking plenty of fluids, especially water. Give your child fibre-rich foods (e.g. apples, pears, beans).
Exercise: Keeping active is really important. Exercise sends blood to the gastrointestinal tract which helps move food waste through the bowels quickly and easily. Running around and playing outdoors will help keep the bowels healthy.
Scheduled toileting routine: Encourage your child to sit on the toilet at least twice a day for 3-5 minutes, preferably 15-30 minutes after a meal. Make this time pleasant; do not scold or criticize your child if they are unable to poo. Follow this consistent routine every day, even during holidays.
Use of encouragement and reward systems: Praise positive toileting behaviour. Try to be positive and encouraging. Give a hug or a hi-five. Leave some toys or books that they enjoy next to the toilet.
Get creative! Distraction is a useful tool when helping children who are withholding or constipated. Try bringing the potty outside, in front of the TV, etc., until they pass their first poo. Blowing up balloons or bubbles, which opens and relaxes the muscles required for bowel movements, may be a way of helping your child to relax and have fun while sitting on the toilet.
This article was contributed by a member of Limerick. [...]
Pride: Gender & SexualityJuly 14, 2023Health & Welbeing / Homepage DisplayYour Child just come out about their gender or sexuality. What now?
The celebration of Pride can mean different things to different people. Pride is a celebration and time of remembrance for LGBTI+ people and for some, this means attending Pride parades or events that usually take place in June or July. For others, Pride is a time of protest, and a time to draw attention to the violence and inequality that LGBTI+ people face.
Many parents will have attended Pride for the first time this year having learned that their children have come out. For many children who have close relationships with their parents or caregivers they feel comfortable to share information about their gender, or orientation. However, For many parents or caregivers when their children come out, this can come as a surprise, or an unexpected piece of information.
In GOSHH (Gender Orientation Sexual Health HIV), we often hear caregivers say things like, ‘’I didn’t see it coming’’ or, ‘’I just wasn’t expecting them to say that!’’. We also hear them tell us how much they care about their children and ‘’we only want the best for them’’. This can be a difficult place to be and can often feel like being stuck between a rock and a hard place with a lot of emotions thrown in.
Caregivers may sometimes feel fearful that their ‘’child is now a stranger and a completely different person’’. They are also ‘’fearful for their safety or wellbeing’’. These are perfectly normal, and natural responses to being told something unexpected, or that you believe, will put your child in danger. Caregivers may also feel this is just who their child is, and want to make sure their child is treated just like everyone else.
A lot of caregivers grew up in an environment where people who are transgender, non binary and gender fluid, those who are Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, or other genders and orientations, were shunned from society, or shamed, because of who they are. Today, we live in a country where a person’s gender and orientation is protected by legislation. Homosexuality became legal in 1993, Marriage equality in 2015, and Gender recognition in 2015. There is still learning, growing, and figuring out to do. We hope that our society will continue to value and celebrate people in all their facets.
In GOSHH, we know from working with young people that the world is changing and for a large proportion of them, a person’s gender is just another piece of information. They find it easier to adapt and correct their language.
We know from research that before a person comes out they are often sitting with this information for a considerable amount of time. Caregivers may feel a pressure to ‘catch up’ and come to terms with this new information about their child quickly. We also know that this takes time. Caregivers can sometimes find this more difficult, understandably. If you have known someone for a long time, and are used to referring to them one way, it can take time to change your language with, and about them.
This may or may not take a while to figure out or adjust. It is important to mind yourself and allow yourself the space to understand what you are feeling, and protect your relationship with your child. Treating your child how you would like to be treated is often the first step.
Some pointers to help:
Caregivers may feel loss, grief or confusion. They may have hopes about their child’s life and may need time to adjust.
Information online can be overwhelming. Try not to get bogged down in the jargon.
If you find yourself struggling with words and getting them wrong, its important to acknowledge these errors, address them and move on.
The support you get at this time is important. Your feelings and reactions are valid. Reaching out to someone you trust is important. As they say! Please put on your own mask before helping others!
You are not alone in this! You are not the only family in the Mid-West, not the only family in Limerick, and may not be the only family in your child’s school.
Allow your child space to figure this out with gentle reassurance, that when they are ready, you are there.
Caregivers may be exceptionally hard on themselves. Don’t underestimate the fact that this is still the child you raised, or you are an important part of their life and they’ve felt it important enough to share this with you.
The world moves fast, taking your time to figure this out is ok. There are supports available to you and your family as well as your child.
Sometimes caregivers forget that they too, need kindness and care. Don’t forget yourself.
We’re only a phone call or email away, our phone number is 061 314354, our website is goshh.ie and our office is Redwood Place, 18 Davis Street, Limerick.
This article was contributed by GOSHH, a partner organisation of Parenting Limerick. [...]
Supporting Parents
Being a Parent is the Most Important Job in the world
Ages & Stages
What’s Happening?
Local Services
Look for more
|
- - - |
- - - |
- - - |
- - - |
- - - |
- - - |
- - - |
|
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
|
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
|
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
|
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
|
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
|
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
|
|
||||||
|
- - - |
- - - |
- - - |
- - - |
- - - |
- - - |
- - - |
|
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
DN_T |
|
|
||||||
You have no events for this day
Look for more
You have no events for this month
Look for more
You have no events for this month
You have no events
stec_replace_image
stec_replace_icon
stec_replace_summary
stec_replace_desc_short
0d 0h 0m 0s
Expired
In Progress
stec_replace_location
stec_replace_timespan
Create an event
Click to submit your own event
Event Info
Location
Schedule
Guests
Attendance
Forecast
Comments
stec_replace_summary
stec_replace_description
-
stec_replace_titleOrganizer of stec_replace_eventstec_replace_about
-
0
days
-
0
hours
-
0
minutes
-
0
seconds
Event expired
Event is in progress
Location
stec_replace_location
Get Directions
Could not find route!
Details
stec_replace_details
No schedule
stec_replace_date stec_replace_time
stec_replace_title
stec_replace_desc
stec_replace_avatar
- stec_replace_social
stec_replace_name
stec_replace_about
You are invited to this event!
-
-
stec_replace_status
stec_replace_name
Weather data is currently not available for this location
Weather Report
Today stec_replace_today_date
stec_replace_current_summary_text
stec_replace_current_temp °stec_replace_current_temp_units
Wind stec_replace_current_wind stec_replace_current_wind_units stec_replace_current_wind_direction
Humidity stec_replace_current_humidity %
Feels like stec_replace_current_feels_like °stec_replace_current_temp_units
Forecast
Date
Weather
Temp
stec_replace_date
stec_replace_icon_divstec_replace_min / stec_replace_max °stec_replace_temp_units
Next 24 Hours
Powered by Forecast.io
E-mail this event
