There is so much information on parenting available through web-sites, blogs, books, radio and television programmes that it can sometimes be overwhelming and confusing. Sometimes, it’s useful to go back to basics and remember what really counts. Below are seven simple messages on parenting that will provide a solid foundation for minding both yourself and your child.
- Parents Need Good Social Networks
Parenting is easier when you can talk with others or spend some time looking after yourself. It is important to share the good times and celebrate achievement; it is equally important to have a support system (friends/family/neighbours, local parent/toddler groups; local groups or clubs) in place during the more difficult times. If you are really struggling, talk to your GP, PHN or other trusted professional or friend to get some support.
- The Parent-Child Relationship is Key.
A strong, loving relationship with a parent or carer is the most important thing for a child. Remember it is never too early or late to start spending time together. Have a chat and find out what they would like to do, whether that is getting outside for a walk or cycle; getting involved in events such as park run together; reading together; watching a favourite film or simply making a cuppa and having a chat.
- A Positive Parenting Style Works
Give your child positive attention, lots of affection and specific praise. Set routines, rules and boundaries and be consistent, no idle threats—children thrive with a routine. Try to remain calm and model positive ways (deep breathing, taking a walk) of dealing with powerful emotions such as anger or frustration. Be genuinely interested in what your child is saying, doing, thinking and feeling.
4. Baby see, Baby do
Be the role model your children need. Children learn by watching their parents so try to model appropriate, respectful behaviour. Avoid talking negatively about others in front of your children. Avoid bad language. If your child talks to you about someone who has caused them harm, discuss this with them without assigning blame. Instead explore the reasons why they did what they did and the impact this had on the other person.
- Name it and Tame It
Communicating with your child is so important at every age. Parents and children who can talk to each other, share problems and address challenges together will have strong, healthy relationships. Be aware of your own emotions. If your child is struggling with big emotions, help them to name and describe their feelings. This is the first step in being able to manage emotions.
- Buy well, Eat well, Be well
Healthy food is important for all the family and is especially important for children’s growth. Include them in planning the menu, shopping and cooking meals. Try to eat at least one meal as a family each day. This is a simple way for everyone to connect.
- Child Safety is Key
Toddler proofing your home, using car seats, teaching road and water safety, learning basic first aid, supervising young children and knowing where older children are and who they are with all helps in terms of reducing child injury and harm.
This article was contributed by Tusla, a member of Parenting Limerick. For more information, on what works best for children and families at different stages of childhood, please see www.parenting24seven.ie.
